Finish Strong

Some wonderful conversations this week.

A handful of women, who didn't all know each other at first, together for lunch  (one to two hours.) All interested in encouraging and uplifting. All are "its not about me" women. Surrounding yourself with friends who nurture the good in you is so important. I like that! Then we all left, off to work, to China, to visit Dad, to nap, to grocery shop, to acupuncture, to exercise ... each to her own.

Here's a FINISH STRONG bracelet lent to me to wear for my first radiation. Pink pearls from the first chemo time, diamond bangle from wedding days in March, and Finish Strong for now, when I need it!

B commented about how she didn't know what to say to comfort a person who has just suffered a loss. I have been thinking about that. We don't often know the perfect words to say. The Spirit might give them to us, or does it really have to be the perfect words. I think the feeling of love is important. But really it is showing up that counts. The gift of being present. Just being with them, trusting that they will get from your actions and words that you love them and care for them. Realizing it is not about you but about them, loving them. What a gift and an honor to be able to open up your heart and pour out compassion and love towards someone else.

We all make mistakes, I have made a huge number of mistakes in my life. In my book, the biggest mistake is not trying. God can redeem a lot of mistakes. He can work through us even when we are bumbling along. But He has a hard time working through me if I sit at home, alone, not communicating with the world, frozen by fear of not being capable enough. Someone wiser than me said, God doesn't call the equipped, He equips the called. 

J said another thought is to email or text or tell the person a verse. God's words, how can my words ever top His? I know that through the past seven months, verses sent to me are treasures. This isn't my suggestion, it was J and S.

And while we are on the topic of technology, S said her son emailed her an article suggesting we all go cell phone free for half a day a week. I do that every day, park it in the mud room next to the garage and the kitchen. I check it at lunch and dinner. I don't like it ringing all the time, I can't think when I am interrupted often. But then, maybe I frustrate some people that I am not available all the time. Who knows...

Fear. Fear is on so many people's minds. How often do we search out ways to allay our worry or  fear? Fear seems to come up in conversation often these days.

My sheep, a gift from someone who listens.

I got a wonderful insight in something I read this week... when we are afraid of the future, about how something might turn out or about what will happen, we are not putting Jesus in the picture we see of the future. We should do that. He will be there. Right in the middle of it, whether it is the best case scenario or the worst outcome or somewhere in the middle. He will be there, right with us. With Him next to us, whispering in our ear that He loves us, what do we have to be afraid of? Boy, this changes my way of thinking.

I don't want to live afraid. I want to live trusting God for my future. Trusting that He will guide me in paths of righteousness and He will be a proactive guide that will bring me back to the path when I turn my head and step off. He will be there with me. He is my shepherd.

I want to live trusting that the world is good, that good things await us all. That overflowing love is in everyone's heart, including my own.  Starting with my own.

It's a beautiful day. Today and all my tomorrows.

Radiation Day 1 - La'Chaim!

Today dear friends is Day 1 of thirty-three radiation treatments.

Every weekday from now till Christmas week.

I understand that this is nothing like Chemo, that the worst is behind me and I am truly grateful.

But I want to finish strong.

That was the point of yesterday's sermon - Finish Strong.

The sermon started out with Leon Lett's story, the defensive tackle who recovered a fumble during the Cowboys Super Bowl XXVII victory over the Bills, but Lett couldn't help showboating on his way to the end zone. He slowed down and danced to celebrate the touchdown, but he was not over the goal line. With the ball in Lett's outstretched hand, Bills receiver Don Beebe caught him from behind and stripped the ball ONE INCH short of the goal line. The ball slid out of the end zone for a touch back. He never scored.

Then we moved to 2 Chronicles 16 and find King Asa of Judah (Israel was split into 2 countries by then, Israel in the north and Judah in the south). Asa started as a righteous man. By the thirty sixth year of his forty one years as king, he stopped relying on God, made treaties with other kings who weren't godly, and basically thought he could do it without God's guidance. WRONG CHOICE.) Sounds like the story of King Henry VIII's reign, for those of you who are Tudor fans.)

I'm thinking Asa didn't one day wake up and say, "Today I have graduated from God's school of life, and I don't need Him anymore." This is the tricky part. It was probably a slow movement away from God. One step off the path. Doesn't even realize his thought is in a direction God doesn't want him to take. Second step off the path, still not in a bad situation, but not where God would put him. Third step, forth, and then fifth, hanging around with a few different counselors (friends for us non-royalty), maybe new activity added. By the time you are on the  fifteenth or twentieth step, your path is now headed for a totally different life than God's choice for you. But now you have around you new people and situations that maybe aren't easy to distance from because you have separated from your old life. This new life isn't SO BAD. But it is not so good either.

It is a slippery slope away from the path God shines His light on for me. Why would I veer from it? Because I don't know I am. I don't notice I'm off the path unless I look. So I must not be looking.

If I ask, God will show me. No matter how far off I am, He will lead me back. Just ask. Really.

God is not trying to trick me up, He wants me to look towards Him every day, all day long. And if I simply look to Him, He will guide me on the path of righteousness (definition: acting according to moral law, without guilt or sin.) Pretty spiffy isn't it.

Finish Strong. That's the nudge I needed... yes I will!

I even saw FINISH STRONG for the first time Wednesday, on the side of Olympia High School. When you have a phrase put in front of you twice in a week, it gets your attention.

I had a moment of "verklempt" exiting church yesterday, tears flooded my eyes as I thought, I am scared. I don't know of what. Intellectually I'm not scared. Just an emotional moment. It was a moment, then it passed. Lunch with B, didn't even talk all about me being scared. It's not the words but the love that carries us through.

Toasts at dinner last night with more dear friends, To all our healing, To being radiant through radiation, To  glowing, To good friends, To our families, With much Gratitude, La'Chaim!

So, FINISH STRONG. As I come to the next chapter in this adventure, I will finish strong. I will keep my eyes on Jesus, spend time with God. I will cooperate with the radiation, picturing the Ray of Light which shines in the darkness. The darkness will not overcome it.

Thank you for your continued prayers for healing.

Thank God for the healing that we already see,

and Thank God for the healing that we will be seeing.