Ever feel like time is a train, a high speed train that is zooming ahead and you are a passenger, holding on for dear life?
I blinked my eyes, and it is the weekend before Chemo again.
I have moments of fear, that this one will be difficult in its aftermath. Then I say - NO NO NO, that is not the attitude to have! Be positive, this one will be even a smidgen easier that #4... and look, I made it through #4 and am here typing, aren't I?
One of my top ten verses right here. I thought of this as I woke up this morning and I picked it apart. I know that if I read commentaries, they would give me insights into this verse that would be great, but I really like just thinking about a verse over and over, what it says to me. What is revealed to me. Try it today...
For God - It starts with Him. He is the driving force, He is the creator of all, and knows the owner's manual for me. Actually He WROTE the owner's manual. He will be with me every second of this week.
gave us a spirit not of fear - Right here He says, fear isn't of Him. Aha, so it is a little demon creeping into my mind, or trying to creep in. When I physically don't feel great, or there is a real trial up ahead, this little demon wants to jump in. Clever, but not clever enough.
but of power - The Spirit God gives me is powerful, powerful enough to say to that little demon, Be gone, I am not going to dwell with you here, and it will go. Powerful enough to rest in God. When you have a project and you have completed it, and you know it succeeds, then you are confident in your ability. This is how we are to be, confident in the power given us by God to overcome anything that bumbles our way in this path of righteousness we are walking. If we slip, if we veer off the path, if we change directions, He is powerful enough to bring us back.
and love - Oh the most important of all. I thought this morning, when you love someone and are acting out that love in your words or thoughts or actions, you are thinking of THEM. In loving others, you are turning the focus of your life to them, and away from you. It is so freeing! "She had a spirit of love", wouldn't you love to have those words alone on your tombstone (not soon of course.) Love is a word we bat around all the time. Think on it when you are next in your thinking mode. I don't want to be the clanging gong, I want to be the healing and uplifting love to others.
and of self-control - At first, this one doesn't seem to fit. I get the spirit of power and love, but this spirit of self-control gets all practical on you. Nuts and bolts practical. But I can see, with the mammoth concepts of a spirit of power and love, you need to reign it in and accomplish something. We are not given power and love to do nothing. We are equipped with power and love so that we might see God more clearly, and then get going however HE wants us to in helping Him in kingdom work down here on earth. The self control might be to use the power and love in the manner He wants.
And then, a little different thought, the self control could be for me to control the input into my brain so that I am looking to Him, focused on Him, and dwelling with Him. It takes self-control to not go down the fear path. There are SO MANY little side branches from the path I am walking down with God. Some of them
look so much like the one I am on that you don't know its a branch at first. Self control to stay in His presence, to keep trusting that He is God even when I don't see the evidence at that moment. To do the things to keep me there. To choose to be there. He will do the work, guide me. I just need to ask Him.
If you are wondering where these photos are from, I'll tell you. Building our home in 2009, Mike and I would come over during that 11 month period most weekends, walk through and see the progress. One weekend we decided to bring our bible, and write verses on the walls before they were dry walled or finished off.
