How the whole thing started.
I was in the shower doing my monthly breast self exam, and came upon a little torpedo in the outside quadrant of the left breast.
You know how they say, You will know it when you feel it?
Well, you will.
I was told to do the self exams lying in bed with arm over head, and also in shower with arm over head. Good thing, as you couldn't feel this at all lying down. When you lie down, its location becomes too buried in to feel.
Anyway, I felt it and knew. I just knew. Instead of calling that morning, I waited until the next day, a Wednesday, and felt it again in the shower. Yep, it is still there. Called my Ob-Gyn, told them I felt something, they could see me the next day.
Went in on Thursday, yes he felt it. Got the prescription for a diagnostic mammogram. Called the mammogram place, they had an opening the following Thursday. Well, as long as I had to wait a week, I thought I might as well get all my ducks in a row because I knew this was cancer and my life would be turned upside down. I scheduled the mammogram for Monday, eleven days out. That way I could go to Sun Valley and San Francisco next week, get things settled there, and be back for the mammogram.
I did that. To Sun Valley, working out schedules and routines for Mike's Dad, interviewing caregivers to add one to the rotation, meeting the realtor as we wanted to move him to a smaller home. And one night in San Francisco, doing the final walk through with the contractor who was at the end of renovating the apartments to sell. And meeting with the estate auction people and estate inventory people. A whirlwind of a week, but it all got done.
Monday the mammogram showed a spot. Yes, the plates that smash your breast into inhumanly thin pancakes really do their job. There was a torpedo, right there where I felt it.
They did the ultrasound right away, which is great. Love that there is always a doctor in attendance who reads your mammogram and can order the ultrasound right then. Ultrasound showed that I needed a biopsy.
Now, this was interesting. They do the biopsies right there. I asked if I could have it done today, or as soon as possible. You know what the hold up was? Aspirin, Flax seed oil and Vitamin E. Because I take those supplements, I would have to wait at least five days. That would be the next Monday. Oh man, you are kidding, right? Nope. I mean, we are talking breast cancer and you are worried about the fifth day of the blood is too thin requirement. Cancer versus a little too much bleeding. Hmmm.
After me asking the same question ten different ways (I am persistent), they told me if my Ob-Gyn gave approval, they could do the biopsy Friday (that's four days not five.) Well, off to the Ob-Gyn office I went. A stop in visit, why not? I guess they don't get too many of them, the receptionist was a bit surprised. But I could have cared less. He was off that Monday, so I left him a written message. He called Tuesday, gave approval for the biopsy one day earlier than recommended. Now all we needed was for insurance to approve it by Friday. They let me schedule the biopsy, they would try to get insurance to give approval by Friday. Friday morning they called, it was approved. In I went.
I had a Fine Needle Aspiration biopsy guided by Ultrasound. Easy enough. Fine needle seems pretty thin. She did one sample and then said she wanted to do a Core Needle Biopsy as that would tell them more information. I am not dumb, I was lying there knowing that meant she knew it was cancer and being a conscientious person, she wanted to get more of it. And of a second spot that looked suspicious. But you know, if she wanted to talk in this coded language, I was fine with it. As long as she was proceeding on.
I was numbed up, and the numbing part was definitely the worst of the pain. So I was pain free. Probably the worst was trying to keep really really still. You have someone sticking a fairly large needle into the side of your breast, referring to an ultrasound screen for guidance, you will be staying still as a deer in headlights. Because that is exactly how you feel.
Went home with lifesaving little thing, a small, freezable compress to pop inside my bra that cooled down the incision site. I can't take pain pills, they give me instant nausea. So icing down the site is crucial. It also helps keep down the swelling. That evening, we marched forward with the neighborhood dinner party planned at our home, a good diversion from the day's events. And I kept popping the little compress into my bra, then into the freezer, etc. No one was the wiser but me.
Then you wait for the call....
