Every time we remember to say "thank you",
we experience nothing less than heaven on earth.
-- Sarah Ban Breathnach
I answered the phone while driving this morning, it was the surgeon's office, where I had a biopsy this Monday. It was B the nurse. She asked me how I was doing today... A BILLION thoughts go through your mind in one second. Is she trying to settle me down for bad news or is it good news so she is relaxed and taking her time? Did she say that with a smile or a tense grimace?
I respond, Every day is a beautiful day. She says, well this news will make today even more beautiful.. I scream out BRAVO and I am certain she is wincing and her ear drum has been burst, but she and I, we don't care. It is a diagnosis of mastitis, which is so not anything at all at this point in time. YEAH! Double YEAH!
I tell the family immediately. This is such fun news. Hallelujah Mike texts back. They all text back, aren't texts great!
Such a thin line between Hallelujah and Oh man.
It is time to ask myself, am I thankful I got cancer?
I know God didn't give it to me. It's a result of cells mutating, and my immune system not being strong enough at this moment to kill the mutated ones.
I know God is efficient and He is using this time in my life to catch my attention, draw me closer, stir me up, and change me forever for the better.
He's showing me how much He loves me, and healing me to better than I was before, in mind, body and spirit.
When I look at photos of times last year, before cancer ,I remember how light hearted I was. I still have moments of light heartedness. I also have moments of knowing God is RIGHT HERE.
Picture this - a black sphere, could be granite or marble. Solid black. Pretty boring to look at? Yes. You look at it for a second or two and move on. No depth, it doesn't tell very much of a story.
Now, if a crack forms in that rock and water with minerals, say silicon and some other minerals, seeps into the crack, quartz could form. And veins of other deposits.
Now the rock looks so much more interesting, more beautiful. The deep black contrasted with white quartz and some taupes and shades of brown from minerals in the crystals.
And that beauty never would have made its way into the black rock if there weren't a crack.
All the experiences we have, every day we live, every person we interact with, they make us who we are. The good and the bad, the joyful and the tearful.
So yes, I can say I am thankful I got cancer. It has added to my beautiful life.
